When you add the combined total number of years three couples from the Holly Creek Retirement Community have been married, you get a nice even and big number: 200.
The adage “with age comes wisdom” was put to the test as these three couples were asked to share their thoughts and insights on the secrets to a long and happy marriage.
Sylvia and Frank Velzen are the “newlyweds” of the group. They have only been married for 63 years. Audrey and Jim Watson follow with 67 years of marriage, and Jenot and Sandy Mills lead the pack with 70.
In a day and age when getting divorced is as easy and almost as common as getting a cup of coffee at Starbucks, the Velzens, Watsons and Mills share their experiences and wisdom that can only be gained by 200 years of marriage.
Shared Experiences
“It hasn’t always been peaches and cream,” recalls Jenot Mills. “Raising a young child alone while Sandy was serving in the war was tough, but we got through it and we’ve been blessed many times over.”
World War II it turns out was a pivotal event for all three couples. The men all served during the war, while Jenot and Audrey, married at the time, managed their homes back in the states. The dangers these men faced while in the service weighed heavily on the minds of their ladies.
In the case of Audrey and Jim Watson, who married after Jim finished basic training, the dangers of war were all too real. While flying a mission over Berlin, Jim, who was a bombardier on a B-17, was struck by shrapnel from an anti-aircraft shell. Severely injured, he spent the next 14 months in a hospital.
Another common denominator all three couples share is the growth of their families post-war.
Jim and Audrey have two children, a son and daughter, five grandchildren and four great-grandchildren. In fact, they moved to Holly Creek to be closer to their children.
Frank and Sylvia have three children: two sons and a daughter, and now have four grandchildren.
Sandy and Jenot have two daughters and two sons. They have been blessed with 10 grandchildren and 10 great-grandchildren.
A third similarity of these three couples is they have stayed active during retirement, and have traveled extensively.
Jim Watson, who retired from Toro after 45 years to start a turf-consulting business, has the most miles under his belt.
“I’ve been to practically every country in Europe as well as Australia, South Africa, Japan and China. Where ever there is a golf course, I’ve probably been there.” Audrey has accompanied or met up with Jim on post-retirement trips to Australia, Greece and Germany.
Frank and Sylvia lived in Panama and Portugal after Frank retired from a 37-year career with Keebler. “If you want great food and great views, visit Portugal,” said Sylvia.
Sandy and Jenot spent many miles on the road visiting their children and grandchildren across the country. Although they no longer travel, they enjoy the frequent visits from family who visit them at Holly Creek.
Secrets to a Long and Happy Marriage
So what are their secrets to a long and happy marriage?
“There are no secrets,” said Audrey Watson. “It takes a lot of tolerance and a lot of luck. If you don’t have tolerance, you’re in trouble.”
“It doesn’t hurt to have a sense of humor,” added Jim Watson.
Jenot agreed. “Having a sense of humor is probably the most important thing to staying married 70 years.”
According to Sandy Mills, “respect your spouse and don’t be critical of one another. Be sure to notice the little things your spouse does. Don’t say, ‘Gee honey, that’s a lousy looking hairdo.”
For Frank and Sylvia Velzen, their faith in God has always been the cornerstone of their relationship.
“You must love and care for each other in good times and in difficult times,” said Frank.
“It’s also important to live within your means and budget for the things you truly need,” added Sylvia.
By Chuck Montera
Located in Centennial, Colorado, seniors have been calling the Holly Creek Retirement Community home for more than five years. Holly Creek offers both independent and assisted living, along with a variety of health services including skilled nursing and memory care support. For more information, visit www.hollycreekretirementcommunity.com or call 303-713-9004.
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